Okay I feel like there are some things that really need to be clarified and I have devoted my weekly Thursday post to really putting to rest the extreme fashion differences between a Redhawk bro, and a Bobcat bro.
First lets start with the Bobcat bro, which has been the topic I personally have been writing about for weeks now. When it comes to fashion, we are simple. Fresh kicks, mid-calfs, nice shorts, lax pinnie or throwback jersey, fresh pair of shades, hopefully a sick mustache, and a great head of hair. If you have been following my blog for the last few weeks, or seen me around campus once, you probably have a pretty dece idea of what the image we shoot for is.
Now let me interrogate the absolute opposite of us: The Miami Bro. They are not only our rival in athletics, but they are the bro’s ultimate fashion rival. One of my bros visited Miami last year to go visit his girlfriend, which to me is unbelievable that he stayed with her since she became a redhawk but that’s besides the point. Anyway, he walked into the party and was there for about 10 minutes, he told me that he didn’t really feel comfortable there because he didn’t know anybody, but being a good boyfriend, he chilled. Eventually he was approached by three kids, all who had more gel in their hair than the Jersey Shore house, and said that he wasn’t aloud to be in their house because he wasn’t dressed nice enough. He was in shorts and a t-shirt.
The Miami bro consists of a button down shirt, which he will probably tell all his friends that he worked a retirement home to afford it, but in reality his dad just feeds him his $1,000 a month allowance. An absolutely atrocious shades game, and the most generic pair of sperries you will ever find. The only thing we have in common with the Miami bros are sperries, but ours are fresher than Mr. Clean, where as theirs are dustier than a TV stand in the attic. It doesn’t end there though. They’re attempt flow will honestly but a true OU bro on the verge of tears… but then he will probably find his best bro, point at the kid and chirp him for days. Oh and sick visor too brah, nothing like tarnishing the name we earned.< Honestly the whole reason I was pissed Charl Schwartzel won the Masters this year… he wears a freakin’ visor!
In other news, Lebron James “apologized” to the city of Cleveland and said that the main reason why he left was that he knew he couldn’t beat the Celtics by himself… talk about the most un-bro statement in human history. If he got struck by lightning tonight, I would probably blare “Cleveland” by Machine Gun Kelly and just laugh. Makes me sick… LeBROAD James.
So please Athens Nation, the worst thing you can do is mistake us for a Miami bro. The main reason being, they walk around with an undeserved amount of accomplishment, whereas we go immensely hard in the paint, and get ours. Our what? That my friends, is up for you to decide.
Bro of the Week: Matt Borda, he is the kid with the 80 yard snizz to secure a win for the WCAC title, also featured on Sportscenter.
Bro Hard OU